unashamedly all about me.... Wendy
what I think.... what I feel.... my emotions... my gut feelings... what I eat... what I believe...what beliefs are changing... what I am doing....where I am going... what I am creating...recipes I love.... books I read.... poetry I write....things that rock my boat and interest me....and also the other way around...our conversation together...our learning together...our sharing together... WELCOME

Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Be Gone Fear.....

My Brother and I do not talk every day. I know that my Brother loves me and that the feeling is mutual and I also know that he likes me and admires me and trusts me.

I love, like, admire and trust him too.

I also find it amazing beyond words that he and I seem so in tune. We seem to get the same inspiration and the same growth in life's journey simultaneously and yet we have not discussed this in any way. His light bulbs go of at the same time as mine. More than a coincidence I feel. We are meant to be Brother and Sister and I feel like I have known him longer than our lives.

So on a grateful note I would like to say a huge thank you to the Universe for him.

Now what happened this time is that I have been reflecting a lot lately. Reflecting and dwelling in dark places and allowing the heaviness to fill me up. I have had many bad times in my life. That's life. But I have never allowed things to overtake me and over the past year when I really should be grateful for so many of my dreams actually coming true I have gone in the opposite direction and let helplessness take over in my life. I have wallowed in self pity. I have allowed myself to be on a roller coaster of emotions. I believe that I have needed to do this. But the time has come to an end. I had a chat to myself last night. I just spoke and then I answered myself. The wise Wendy spoke and the scared lost Wendy listened. I can't explain it any other way. I believe with all my heart that I am the only person that can control me. I am my thoughts.

Over my life as I have grown I unwittingly kept my mind from bad things. I watched a horror movie when I was younger and decided that that type of entertainment had no place in my life. I very rarely watched TV and now for the past 7 years I have not owned one. I don't watch or read novels that are about killing and torture. I knew what the basic world news was but I didn't fill my life with it's gore and sadness every day. That does not mean that sadness and bad things did not happen to me or my family but it did mean that I spent a fairly large amount of time choosing things that made me feel good. That lifted me up. Sometimes it was simply being tough in the face of disaster and heartbreak.

I have not felt tough or secure or truly happy or content or stable or free and peaceful in quite sometime. I wouldn't say that I always felt those things but I certainly could bring myself on track and bring them into my life when feeling overwhelmed.

My wise Wendy spoke to me last night and showed me that I have surrounded myself with negative,sad, bad and yucky thoughts. In my quest for knowledge I have come across news, blogs, book and information that has always the negative spin on it. A while ago I read or heard someone say that in relation to this earth and the many problems it faces that it best that we do not allow it to consume us. That for all the preparation through knowledge or physical things the one thing that will help us get through life is being clear headed and calm and and more ready in mind for changes than being ready in stuff.

I follow a blog by Joy. Here is the link. Being Joy.  This blog is amazing and her email newsletter that I get every Monday is always inspiring. So for me reading Joy is a joy and helps me simply smile when I do not feel like smiling.

I also follow many others but below are the links to a few of the truly most uplifting ones I read regularly.
Down To Earth
Elles Daily Inspiration
Ordinary Courage
Minimalist Lifestyle
Lessons From The Monk I Married
Frills In The Hills  (Simply because it is bright, fun, colourful and has some great recipes)
1000homes of happiness ( this is my latest discovery and I am excited to say that I will receive a little home of my own to release soon)

Now each of these has a different feeling that sits with me when I read them and each of these has a completely different content. But they make me feel good. They feed my soul. The lighten my day and my load and usually teach me something as well.

Wise Wendy suggested to me that I need to let go of the negative. Surround myself with positives. Positive words, images and speech. I know that this may sound like sticking your head in the sand to many. But I truly do not mean it that way. I am old enough to know that life is life and it is what it is sometimes. I am not saying that money will not be tight and trying times will not happen. I am saying that I need to let go of all the fear mongering going on in my life. Society is ruled and governed by fear. The more afraid you are made of things that could happen to you then the more compliant you will be. How easy it is to gather many people together doing and acting and being the same when they are all afraid of the same thing and have been given a picture and words that they are told are the correct way that they can handle this fear. This threat that they may have been warned about. Let me add that I am not ignorant. I understand real threats and some are rather huge. The point for me is to not let fear consume me and paralyse me and take away my happiness and joy.

Wise Wendy said to me last night to just be. Just be here and now. Some people live in their past and others live in the future. I am the future type of person. That does not make it any easier to live without fear than someone who lives in the past. They are full of fear from regrets and I am always fearful of what will happen next. I have read many things about living in the present. I am not going into here. Suffice to say that I obviously do not mean that plans cannot be made. The point is that I need to start living. Start believing in good things again. Start having fun. Start my engine again. Soar on eagles wings. Trust myself like never before. Laugh in the face of adversity again. Revel in my family and friends. Simply appreciate what I have and where I am now. Believe in the Universe. Let go of fear.

Tonight I read on face book a comment by my Brother and watched a little film clip that he also posted with regards to some inspiration he has had through a good friend of his. And she is a very good friend indeed.

He is in the same place. Different words but the same thing. I had wanted to write again. I have not written for a long time. But tonight when I read his little comment about Why Not and about the book given to him to read by a friend I thought now. Now I will write.

As a last thought I would like to remind everyone of how powerful we can be when we do not even know we are being powerful. When no force is used but a helping hand, a friendly gesture, a smile, a simple act of kindness, a compliment, an encouraging word and a loan of a book and a night out to watch some wonderful musicians.

Love and Peace and Joy to you all. Even though it is not Christmas yet.



  1. It is so wonderful to have you back, feeling that you want to be in this blogland. : )

  2. Yes...wonderful to have you back Wendy. Thanks for the beautiful post and sharing your innermost thoughts. :)

  3. lovely to be introduced to this little space...x

    We look forward to seeing where our little home ends up....thanks for the mention.


  4. Wow. I really don't know what to say but thank you for such a wonderful post. Hopefully, one day I will have a wise nevyn who will have a nice long chat with me. It's way overdue.

    It's good to have you back.

  5. Thank you all so much for your comments. Your encouragement means the world to me. xxooxxoo