unashamedly all about me.... Wendy
what I think.... what I feel.... my emotions... my gut feelings... what I eat... what I believe...what beliefs are changing... what I am doing....where I am going... what I am creating...recipes I love.... books I read.... poetry I write....things that rock my boat and interest me....and also the other way around...our conversation together...our learning together...our sharing together... WELCOME

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Delayed Gratification / Turn the TV off

I saw this on the net somewhere - can't actually remember where - Is this a cool idea or what.

Hello to all

I just wanted to share a new blog that I am putting together. It is evolving slowly. I had an idea to start up a local community group. Just a bunch of friendly people who want to learn and share. It is still all just getting the idea going but I will use this blog to post recipes and such as well as pearls of wisdom. I don't want meetings as such with people in charge. I just want to share. Lets say you want to learn to bake a loaf of bread. Then my daughter can teach you that. If you want to make an awesome tomatoe relish then I can show you that. Sewing, cooking, craft, homecare, gardening. Whatever. Below is the link to the post I put on yesterday.

What I am discovering as this evolves is that there is a real gap in many young peoples lives. They want to set up home properly, they want to be proud of their home and homemaking efforts but they simply do not know where to start. I do not have all of the answers but I can point them in the right direction to start exploring themselves.

How cool it is for me to see a young woman start to think of her home as something to be proud of and that it is a worthy role. All very exciting.

Delayed Gratification


Now I have posted the link below to another blog I have started to follow because I can soooo relate to what is written. I invite you to take a look. I have linked to the latest post that I found very interesting. You may also.

Easiest Way To Save Money

Cheers,
Wendy

Monday, September 20, 2010

I Finally Eat My Pineapple - A Walk Through My Garden

Daisy's

Lavender
Like little stars.

King Parrots in my front arden. I was sitting in my office and managed to get some reat shots of my little visitors. Such brilliant red and green colours.

Isn't this just so beautiful. Delicate. Gorgeous.


Black Eyed Susan all along my front fence



Red Geranium

More Daisy's in my rock garden



Parsley on my kitchen bench

My shallots are flowering - it looks like seeds - does anyone know if I can collect these seeds and grow more shallots from them?

Rosemary

The rosemary has a little blue flower on it as well.

The coriander has gone to seed. Can anyone tell me please when I pick them. Should I pick them while they are still green or should I wait for them to go brown?

More coriander flowering and going to seed.

My pineapple is HUGE and has started to change colour. It is turning orange from the bottom up. It is so heavy that is is on a lean on the plant. I have had to cage it so the possums do not get it before I do. I have to go away for a few days and I am concerned that it will ripen in the next few days while away so I think I will pick this and let it finish ripening inside my home.

Flowering native shrub. I think it might be a type of wattle. I don't know. All I know is that these little shrubs are all around the place and the yellow is so brilliant. Gorgeous.


I pick the pineapple in the early morning. Still in PJ's.

Such a huge pineapple. Everyone is looking forward to a slice.

And it tastes SOOOO GOOD. perfect, juicy, summery and I now have another plant starting to flower. Next season I will get two pineapples and the year after I have about 6 that will all get fruit on at about the same time. That's when I will learn all about preserving them.


Tuesday, September 7, 2010

Raising Children and Expectations

Raising Children. There is no harder task that I have been given in this life. My children have given me polar opposites
- Absolute Sheer Joy and A Love That I Can Physically Feel
and
- Absolute Feelings Of Helplessness and Despair

I just read my brothers blog and here is a link to his recent post. EXPECTATIONS from his blog The Soap Box Truth.

I left a fairly lengthy comment on there and decided to pursue this topic further.

I have three children that are all grown up now. Well in age they are adults. But each one is at a different place in there lives and it seems that the last one (18) is coming first and the first one (28) is still struggling to catch up and the middle one (26) is as invisable as ever.

I have struggled over the years with a guilt that has had the potential to overwhelm me. Actually in truth it has at times. I just hid it well. The guilt of not getting it right - this parenting thing. We hear the cliches of "parenting does not come with a manual" sort of things. My mother has constantly said to me over the years - You Did The Best With The Knowledge You Had At The Time.



But sometimes over the years I ache in my heart for all the wasted opportunities with my children as they grew and coming to terms with the fact that I was not an overly good parent. Not all my fault I know but it is something I have had to come to acknowledge. The world got in the way. The way we have to work such long hours ( a whole other post in my views on this alone) The way we are not truly supported in the community. Sometimes for people the lack of guidance from their own upbringing. I had a loving upbringing but I did learn some very bad habits that I then taught my children by default.

One of those things was that I never had the bar raised for me. I was loved unconditionally. I wasn;t expected to do too much around the house. I was allowed to live in my very special WENDY place and pretty much do whatever I could get away with. Luckily I have a strong fear of getting into trouble with the law so I was pretty much able to make sure I never got into that sort of trouble. But I realise as I write this that even though I have made some mistakes over my life that I had two parents that taught me by example the below things.

WORK - you simply have to go to work - I have always worked from the age of 12 years old with my first job collecting eggs on an egg farm.
MANNERS - I am never rude intentionally to someone and if I fall I apologise.
UNCONDITIONAL LOVE FOR MY CHILDREN
HONESTY - this includes not stealing as well as telling the truth
RESPECT - for others and others property
FAMILY STICKS TOGETHER - a strong belief that if you can't get all the family members in the house to respect each other then there is no hope for country's to be able to get on.

So even though some things I had to learn through life by stumbling through and learning as I go  I had a VERY STRONG BASE to build my life on. So I have learnt that just like what my parents did for me and my sister and brother I have done with my children. Even though they may make their mistakes I feel that under all of that is a strong foundation of the above things. They know them. It is up to them if they choose to make their descisions based on them.

AHHHH the fine line - the tight rope. I failed to raise the bar for my first two. And have learnt that whatever you put of because it is to hard emotionally will have to be dealt with one day. Procrastination buys you some time but not heart ache.

I have learnt that you have to learn to say NO and that the sooner you learn it the better of you are. You have to learn to turn your back when it is required and ALLOW your children to learn a lesson for themselves. By the time I got to my last one I had finally got some of these things clear in my head. I constantly reinforced what I expected of her at each stage she was at and then offered her a clear choice with consequences that I made sure she had had to deal with. I am only just doing this now with my eldest because I put it of and he also was a very slow learner. Not just academicly but in learning lifes lessons. I actually have had to literally turn my back and walk away so that he can choose his own path and have had to come to the realisation that I cannot carry him any further. I am trusting in God now and that is all I can do.


I have learnt that middle child syndrom is real. I have a middle son who has learnt to be invisible. He is easy going. He is soft and caring. But he is insular and all the years I have left this one just go about his business because he doesn't and hasn't caused me too much trouble now have to be dealt with. If I want a relationship with him I have to work on it and now deal with any of the procrastinations I have done in the past. It truly does come around.

Believe me - whatever you put of today will have to be dealt with sooner or later and often times it is so much harder later on.

But I can say without a shadow of a doubt that my children all love me and LIKE me as well. Somethings I got right.

But I have learnt that leading by example is really the only way to totally follow through.

If you want kind children - you have to be kind yourself.

If you want your child to be friendly, helpful, well mannered, confident - then the flip side is that you must teach these things from example.

As you have mentioned - society will usually teach the opposite and I have found through all the thick and thin of life that by being a constant guide and a constant source of what is right will always win out in the long run.

Raising the bar - as I call it - is of the utmost importance. Lowering the bar so that the child can jump through hoops easily will do them no favours. On the other hand this takes a lot of constant vigilent supervising and understanding of where they are at emotionally and intellectually at any given time.

Working out the balance may never be exact - the balance of time out and free thinking time along with down time balanced with the hard slog head down sort of attitude we want them to have.

And that is hard work. So again your example of never giving up on them and expecting the best from them while supporting and listening and doing our utmost to understand them is of so much importance.

All easier said than done. I admit.


Your comments are welcome. Maybe something you have to add would be of help to others. So share.

One of things I didn't have or pursue while my children grew up was a strong support network of other families with children. I never spoke to others about parenting and asking for ideas. I had my two boys so young that all my friends didn't start having children until mine were nearly grown up. I encourage my daughter to build a strong network of other parents with other children the same age as her little one. You don't have to do everything the same as them but you do need friends that can listen and work things through with.

Thanks for reading,

Wendy

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Blogs that get me.....

Cheesy Potato Bake. YUM.

Do you cook? Do you bake?  Do you like Raisin Bread? Do you have daughters? I have found a great blog that I have spent hours on just looking through and saving recipes from as well as reading her excellent posts. I really like this blog and today there is a link to a video called It's A Dad's Life. Brilliant. Go on leave me alone here and get yourself of to take a look at this blog. But come back cause I have more to talk about.

Frills On The Hill

Welcome back. What did you think of that? I am so going to make that raisin bread tomorrow. But she says one slice, toasted, with butter is enough for breakfast. We''ll SEE.


My dauhters first ever homemade bread - I am so proud of her and I enjoyed the ceremony of the eating of this bread. We all gathered around the table to see the bread come out of the oven and then sat there and ate the entire loaf with copious amounts of butter and spreads.

Now on a huge EXIT STAGE RIGHT I am now going to put a link here to another blog that I follow and a post that I just left a long comment on. Very long. But I answered all of the questions asked and it felt good to put my views down in some sort of order. It felt good that someone asked. Now this post is thought provoking and some of the things she mentions you may never have heard of. Others of you will defineately have heard of these issues. It would be great if you had a read and if it leads you to explore and learn more then that would be great.

Eat At Dixiebelles

Cheers,

Wendy

Friday, September 3, 2010

Some Photos To Share......




Hello to all....

I have not written much lately. Time to take stock and time for time out...just thinking. I have not stopped reading all of the blogs I follow and I seem to just keep adding more and more. So many interesting people and subjects and photos and I just simply enjoy sharing in other peoples lives and count it a blessing that you all let me in for a glimpse.

The above photo is taken from down the back of our 3 acre block. Green in winter - how wonderful. This was taken in the middle of winter and last year it was just brown and crunchy under foot. What a change in weather this year. Lots of water.


Another one of our land. Just gorgeous.

Maryborough Qld Australia. Town Hall. I just love this building and I just love to be at the markets on a Thursday morning and just stand there and listen to the clock chiming out the time while all the hustle and bustle is going on.

Laying under a tree on the beach. Awesome.

As you can tell I like trees. I never know the correct name for each one but I don't think that matters. I just call this a "big tree".

This was posted onto a wall at a rest/picnic area that Mick and I went to one day. Cool hey !! Much better than posters for things long finished or graffiti of names and tags of no meaning.

Now this is a wattle tree - I know that much - and when camping a while back the whole park was just full of these gorgeous white blossoms and I just couldn't stop looking at them and taking photos. Beautiful.

Have a great day tomorrow everyone.

God Bless you all,

Wendy