The rooftops of ATHENS in Greece at Sunset
Today I spent more time organising. Tidying up. Sorting out.
The past year has been one of the hardest I have had in many ways for such a long long time.
I let it all catch up with me and get on top of me. I then had a bit of a AHA experience the other day. Basically I just had enough of whining and whinging and going backwards and generally just not being to happy with my lot in life. Just sick of everything feeling futile and hopeless.
It's my choice. I knew that. I didn't need to learn something new to know that I can change my life by changing my thoughts and my actions.
Much easier said than done.
One of the monastries at Kalambaka in Greece
But Mick was going away for work for a week and I realised I had the perfect opportunity to start some personal changes and spend some ime with me. So on Sunday afternoon he left and he is not back until Friday.
I have stopped smoking again. I am past the horrible day two. Been there and done that before. I have a big party at our place on Saturday night but there is always something on and always an excuse. It's the 3 month mark that has let me down the last two times I have stopped smoking. I am trying to prepare and plan ahead.
I am choosing to take some much neded advise from others in blogland and that is be kind to myself. Be a little selfish. Give myself the time and the energy that I would give to others. Oh what a learning curve.
Can you see the monastries built on top of the rock cliffs - amazing?
This week I said NO to something asked of me by my daughter. Just a simple request to meet her in town but it just didn't suit me because it was Monday and the first day of not smoking and I also had very little fuel. No is not an easy word for me unless it is saying No to myself and then that comes very easy.
I am practising YES on myself. I am having a bit of fun with myself.
Street in Myconos Greece. I just couldn't get enough of the white washed walls and pathed paths.
I have also on two occasions this past week listened to my son talk without giving any advise or trying to fix things. And to top it of when I had enough of listening I said I had to go and terminated the conversation. Sounds like a littel thing. HUGE for me is what it is. Son never actually asked me for anything. He was just talking but usually the Motherly Protective I Can Fix It All person steps in. Well not this time. Oh what a feeling. Letting it go. Letting it all go.
Concentrating on doing ALL I can about the things I can change and letting it GO with the stuff I have no control over.
I have been getting up and doing my yoga before breakfast and oh that makes me feel good. I actually gave myself a big hug yesterday which made me laugh out loud. That was cool.
Oh how I wish I was back there - I would return to Greece anyday.
I have realised that I am a bit anal and like things to have a place and be in their place so I can find what I want when I want it. I like things tidy. Not new news to me. My house was a mess, I mean dusty, cob webby messy. I fixed that up. All on top of it now and I will get back to cleaning the house everyday but deep cleaning - dusting etc one room a week. Easy to stay on top of.
I have half started projects all over the place. It frustrates me having things unfinished. I have decided to stop collecting information until I have sorted out what I have. I have decided to finish of the Christmas presents over the next two weeks and then after Christmas I will sort out one project a week at least and get all this other clutter under control. In the meantime everything has been put in it's own little neat pile. At least I know what I am looking for.
I have booked for my hair to be done a few days before Christmas.
I have saved my smoke money and I have it stashed away for when I see something I want. I actually couldn't think of anything I wanted at the moment. I may go for a nice massage and pedicure actually. It will only take me to the end of next week to have enough for that.
My favorite island - Santorina - this is Fira. I have a dream of going back here. I don't usually go back to someplace I have been but I think I would make the exception for Santorini. Not one picture can truly do it justice of how beautiful it is.
Anyway I just wanted to share that it feels good to getting back into FLOW.
I have been off course and feel like I have found my way back. Obviously not without some effort but it definately feels like a weight has lifted.
Love and Peace to you all,